Buried in Guilt – I

Petrina Bannerman ran through the dark moonless night through very familiar streets but under highly unfavourable conditions. It was raining cats and dogs but she had to run. With every step she took, she felt weaker and weaker as several drops of rain hit her as though she were being hit with a whip. Her wet clothes and shoes made the action even harder; it suddenly appeared as though she weighed twice as much as she actually did.

Why did I allow this to happen?

I saw this coming, why did I act as though I didn’t?

Why, God, why?

All these questions run through her mind as she ran and she had absolutely no idea how to answer them.

Oh, God, when did it all start?

And how did it even start?

Now the work her brain was doing as she pondered over these questions was getting her more exhausted. Without noticing, she ran onto a major road. She noticed the headlights of the car just a second before it would have sent her to her grave at the moment of impact. The driver stopped his car and stepped out, obviously ready to lash harsh words at her but probably her confused expression made him think otherwise.

“Hey, lady, where are you going to in this rain?”

Where am I going to? Good question, she thought to herself. She really did not know where she was headed for. She ignored the driver, crossed the street and continued her run. In all those moments that she had thought about how this day would probably be, she had never thought about this bit of the journey. All she knew was she would end up somewhere in the Northern or Upper East Region. How she was going to get there, she did not know. Really, she had not even expected it to be on a night like this and in the rain as well. In actual fact, she had never anticipated this day would ever be lived in reality. It was just a story she wrote in her thoughts.

Her phone began to vibrate in her pocket. That must be Gerald, she thought. She decided not to pick up. Besides, her run was more important. The phone stopped vibrating. Then it started all over again.

What do I do, Lord?

And why am I asking You so many questions now, Lord when I did not listen to You just a few minutes ago.

Caught up in her thoughts again, she missed the knotted and netted roots of the neem tree she was passing by. She tripped over it and fell face down with a loud thud. Though it caused her great pain, she resisted screaming as she knew better than to call unnecessary attention to herself, just in case anyone was around too. She could hardly move. She was tired. Her clothes were dripping wet. Her whole body ached. She had no choice but to lie under the neem tree in the quiet deserted land, several kilometers from home.

Home? Would I ever go back home?

She could not move but she could not even think about sleeping in the conditions she was faced with.

It was going to be a long night.

Why is Petrina running? Where would she end up? Who is Gerald?

Watch out as the story unfolds. Catch you in the next post!